The Way to a Will
For years I went to bed crying because I couldn’t write my book. Not couldn’t, per se, more like wouldn’t. Or is it fair to say “wouldn’t” if it wasn’ [...]
The Continuance of Courage
I’m supposed to speak at a 12-step meeting tomorrow, and I don’t know what to say. "Speaking” at a meeting means that you share your experience, stren [...]
Grace from a Gecko
Of all the things, I never expected a tiny gecko to appear in my kitchen sink. It’s HOT here in the desert, extraordinarily so, as we are (yet again) [...]
The Presence of a Small Parrot
“I miss her, God,” I said aloud, my heart filling up with a familiar aching. I had just arrived home from work and my thoughts had turned to my last g [...]
Ascertaining Autonomy
Breakups don’t get easier with sobriety, they get different. Last week I wrote about the decision I needed to make (see previous post The Conundrum of [...]
The Conundrum of No Contact
“Do I have to go no contact?” I asked my sponsor 10 days ago. I was reviewing what needed to be discussed with my girlfriend that night, as part of ou [...]
Reasoning About a Return
Eight days ago, my separated partner and I said goodbye—for now. “It’s so hard to believe it is over,” I texted a friend last night in part, to keep m [...]
Observing with an Open Heart
No one ever died from feeling emotions. But there is a first for everything. “This open-hearted thing feels like it will be the death of me,” I said i [...]
Security in the Self
I often find myself telling someone else exactly what I need to hear. “We crave to be in the position of powerlessness so we don’t have to sit in the [...]
Getting Ahead of God
Messages show up in the most peculiar of places. “Wait, you actually have one of those?!?” I asked incredulously. “Yes, it’s in my garage. Well actual [...]